Wednesday, October 3, 2012

Remembering Brock

I've been pretty fortunate in my life to not have experienced much death.  I have all four of my grandparents still, all of my extended and immediate family.  I even had the same dog from when I was 5 years old up until just last October.  My dog dying was very terrible for me, and probably the worst I've experienced.  Call me lucky, or call me unlucky because it will probably all come crashing down at the same time.  But all I know is, I can't imagine the horrible pain that comes from losing someone you truly love.

I lost a friend this past weekend.  He and I used to work together as lifeguards when we were younger.  He was so funny at work, he was always getting in trouble.  I think he gave us more business than any of the patrons did because he was always getting hurt!  I think every time I saw him he had some kind of new cast.  I think he was a little more daring than he should have been.  Once I got a job in the hospital I work at, Brock and I lost touch.  It wasn't until about two years ago that I saw Brock again at SLCC sitting in the student commons area.  I went over and sat with him and gave him a hug.  I caught up with him on the last few years and found out he was pretty amazing at math and wanted to become a math teacher.  He was working on calculus homework that day, a foreign language to me.  We exchanged numbers and looked each other up on Facebook so we could stay in touch.

Brock had Crohn's Disease which eventually led to Primary Sclerosing Cholangitis which is basically scarring and inflammation of the bile ducts in the liver, causing an obstruction to the flow of bile leading to liver failure.  I didn't really know this when Brock was sick... I knew he was sick and had some kind of liver disease.  But it was Brock, he went to the hospital for a little while, and he always came home.  He'd had this disease ever since I'd met him.  Brock was a super hero.

Whenever Brock had to come to the hospital, he would always send me a text letting me know he was here (because I work at the hospital he was treated at).  I was only able to go and see him one time a while ago, but we would always talk about how boring it was to be in the hospital.  He was such a positive guy though, he always talked highly of the nurses assigned to him!

Brock and I hadn't talked for a while over the last couple of months.  I assumed he was doing better and was busy with life.  I always enjoyed the funny things he would post on Facebook and he always enjoyed seeing pictures of my dog because we both had a love for dogs.  However, it turns out that the last couple of months Brock was actually doing a lot worse.  He needed a liver transplant.  At one point he even had a liver ready for him, but he wasn't strong enough to endure the surgery.  They had to give the liver to someone else while he got better.  Once he finally was better, there was no liver of course.  He waited and waited.  And got worse while waiting.  What I didn't know is that he got bad to the point of no return.  Brock passed away on September 28th with his family surrounding him.  

It's so hard to believe it's real.  I feel like tomorrow I'm just going to see Brock back at his happy go lucky self again.  It's so heart breaking to think his beautiful presence won't be felt here on the Earth anymore.  I don't know Brock's family, but I send my prayers and love their way.  If only they knew how many people really do love Brock and will be missing him.  Brock was an amazing loving person who didn't deserve to have his life here cut short.  

I pray that in Brock's honor and others like Brock, everyone will take careful consideration when they choose not to mark organ donation on their license.  One tiny decision to donate an organ to those in need when you no longer can use it may make the difference needed in another young 21 year old's life, saving them from dying waiting for that person who did make that small decision to save others.

In loving memory of Brock Barber Butler.

2 comments:

  1. Hi Heather, I am Brock's dad. I enjoyed reading what you have written about him and really appreciate your being his friend, and for posting a very accurate account of his disease and his final battle. Brock was a true super hero and I could not be more proud - or heart broken at this time. There are many "what if's" in life but one thing I am certain about is he couldn't have been a better person. Thanks again for sharing your friendship with my son. Rod Butler

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  2. Oh, so good to hear from you! Thank you for commenting on this, it makes it feel so much more meaningful. Brock was and always is an amazing person, you raised a wonderful son! I couldn't have asked for a better friend and miss him terribly! My prayers are with your family always!

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